This year, so far, has been an exercise in disappointment. A relationship that seemed promising blew up unexpectedly. I lost an election at work for something I really wanted to do. Three attempts at home buying all ended in terminated contracts. I put back on 10 pounds of the weight I lost last year. It feels like life is trying to tell me something, and it’s probably time to listen.
I dislike change and find it very hard to adjust to unexpected circumstances. People are often surprised by this, because I’ve always been the one to up and move to another city (or once, continent) and I’m often told how brave I am. I’m really not; every move has a bunch of research and risk calculations behind it. But this time around, it all feels different. I did the analysis and still had everything fall through. Very little has gone the way I expected it to this year.
It appears to me that the common theme in all of this is that I need to learn to let go when things don’t go my way. I’m still angry about all the things that haven’t worked out, and it’s preventing me from moving forward in a healthy way. But I’ve had enough of being stuck, and I have a plan to get unstuck!
Let go of everything that isn’t serving me
My first plan of action is to clean house, literally and figuratively. I am going to clean out closets and get rid of the piles of junk that I haven’t looked at in years. I’ve been reading about the Konmari method, and may apply of the basics to this process. I particularly like the method for organizing drawers. I’m going to let go of “friends” that I never see, or that bring more conflict than joy into my world. I already deleted my online dating profile. I’m cleaning up my diet and cutting back on sugar and alcohol. Basically, I’m going to strip my life down to the basics, and see what I’m left with.
#regram : @mariekondo •⠀ Folding clothes with the KonMari Method is one of my favorite things because it's 1) super-practical – you can fit much more into limited space, it's so much easier to see what you have, and 2) it's actually soothing and meditative and feeds your spirit because the result is beautiful and orderly. •⠀ Every single client to whom I've taught Konmari folding announces to me regularly that they love doing it and their drawers still look great! (And that says a lot from people who used to have drawers full of chaos and who said they hated folding laundry). Beautiful photo from certified KonMari Consultant @worthwhile.me and⠀ 📷: @adahmed2017⠀ . . . . . #soulfulsimplicity #soulful.simplicity #konmarilife #konmarimethod #konmariconsultantmontreal #organizedhome #beautyeveryday #sparkjoy # #konmari #organizetheworld #tidy #declutter #decluttering #organization #organizer #inspiration #homeinterior #homedecor #lifestyle #home #homedesign #interiorstyling #hygge #mtllife #mtlrealestate #514fashionista #montreal
Make space for the things I want
With all the crap out of the way, I plan to get clarity on what is actually important to me. For example, I enjoy crafty things like soap making, painting, and making jewelry. Right now, my supplies are buried in a closet, and in the case of my jewelry kit, my supplies are disorganized and hard to use at all. Cleaning everything up and out will allow me to get back into the things that bring me joy, help me to unwind, and provide an outlet for creativity.
I also want my home to be a calm and comfortable place, and for the most part, it is. I do really want to get my spare bedroom tidied so that it’s a nicer place to spend time. That room tends to be where the messes pile up, but it’s also where my guests stay, where my desk is, and where my dartboard is set up. I could really be using that room if it weren’t so messy!
The bigger, more long-term goals still include home buying and finding a great relationship. By eliminating some of the clutter and noise, I hope to make space in my life for these things that I really do want to find.
Focus on plans to get there
After three failed house buying attempts, I decided to sign another year lease at my apartment. I am going to focus on saving money so that I have more budget to work with, and try again next Spring.
I started hiking this year, and really want to keep going with that. Unfortunately, our mountains are closed to all recreation due to fire danger, so that is on hold for the moment. It does give me time to clean house, and I can still take long walks with my pack to keep myself in shape until the fire danger passes. I am also starting to explore camping and backpacking, though I still need to find my people for that.
Finally, there’s the old problem of finding a relationship. I know that online dating is NOT working; I’m not sure what to try next. My most successful relationships were with people I met while I was out living my best life, so I think that’s what I need to do. Maybe I’ll meet my person out on a trail somewhere, or at the gym, or on some new adventure. For now, I just need to be my own person, and trust that everything else will fall into place eventually.
Have you ever done a major life clean out? Did you read the Konmari book? Tell me in the comments!
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